winter blues

It’s been a while since I last blogged anything, so here’s something.

While this year has been a doozy, we’re somehow getting through it together. Even though we are at least six feet apart and wearing masks, of course. Regardless of how insane we all feel & how much sh*t 2020 has thrown at us, if you’re reading this now, you’ve almost made it. The end is in sight, and there is hope on the horizon.

As I’m sure most of us have, I’ve been feeling a whole lot of feelings lately, and not just because there is a global pandemic going on (although that is already a good enough reason to be feeling a whole lot of feelings as it is). This time of year always kicks my butt, whether it’s physically, mentally, or emotionally, or all three mixed together. While I love Christmastime, and New Year’s, and my birthday in late January, it’s so dark and so cold all the time that it’s no wonder we are all miserable messes.

So for me, when I’m really feeling moody & down in the dumps after I peek out my window at four o’clock in the afternoon and the sun is already gone, I set up my light studio that my parents gave me for my birthday one year so many years ago, and I plop my DSLR on a tripod, and I change into my favorite shirt, and throw on a random hat that I KNOW my friends will make fun of me for later, and I smile at the camera and pretend like this is a normal thing that people do when they are feeling sad. And for those brief seconds while the camera shutter clicks, I laugh at myself for how silly this is. And yet somehow, it is successfully doing the trick of distracting me from the scary place inside my brain. If only for a moment.

And if you’re like me, and you live in the Northeast, and you rarely ever see the sun it seems, and your vitamin D levels are so low your body is screaming at you to get a little bit of sunshine, try a little something silly. It doesn’t have to be this, but any small thing that sparks a smile or a laugh. I hope you find something that brings you even a teeny tiny piece of joy today. Even if it’s just looking at these goofy self portraits I photographed…